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World News
Fri Mar 08, 2013 12:32 pm
Update from the 2012 WWBN Election Newsroom...

Polls closed just minutes ago but with the expertise of the finest countermonkey's have projected a landslide win for former WWBN Mad Mad World Host Dunena Reid.

Exit poll results give a strong 80% majority result for the newcomer with some even choosing to vote for exotic animals then give a vote to Frump in what has to be his worst result ever.

You heard it here first, Dunena Reid is the new American Minister for Magic!

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Sat Jan 21, 2012 6:52 am
The Magical world today woke to a flurry of Werks and stories after last night's broadcast of Dunena Reid's Weird Weird World hinted, quite strongly that recently crowned Houglass Magazine's Person of the Year Dunena Reid, was set to enter the race for the 2012 American Magical Elections with no lesser sight then the Minister's position currently held by Ronald Frump.

Speaking to the Ministry this morning reporters where told that while some paperwork may have been received it was after the weekend cut-off and would not be looked at until the subsequent week at the earliest.. unless it had fallen on the desk of one F. Blake in which one just had to hope that it would be filed at all.

Considered a possible hoax a interview with Producer and year long associate of Mr Reid Benjamin Jefferson led to the following statement "The hell I know? Trust me man I'm usually the last to find out these things"

More on this story and other top breaking news including the protest by Interweb giants Woozle against Muggle proposed internet filtering laws, after this break.

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Tue Dec 20, 2011 1:05 pm
The Accademia Magica di Italia is proud to announce the hiring of Chudley Canons star player, Jamie Savage as its new professor of Broom Flying Instruction and team quidditch coach. Interim Headmaster Angelo Benito made the announcement at a press conference this morning. He stated that "The school is pleased and grateful that someone of Senore Savage's talent would accept a position like this. The students will benefit greatly from his expertise". Professor Savage has already begun working with the students and the team has their first game soon against Venice Magical Academy.

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Sat Nov 12, 2011 7:22 pm
Our Paris news desk reports that police in Paris have begun searching the Seine River for the body of a man who is believed to have jumped from one of the bridges in a possible suicide attempt. Reported by a party on one of the barges docked along the Seine, this raw footage shot by one of the party goers shows the man plunging into the river. No sign of his exit from the river has been found and they believe that he died on impact.

Next up is....

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Fri Sep 02, 2011 10:23 am
Yes ladies the roamers where true that none other then high flung socialite and darling of the European Ministry Fifi LaRoux has been sighted in Melbourne, Australia which has recently been named the worlds most livable city for a second time.

While none have stated what brought on the arrival of Miss LaRoux there's been no question that the world famous Hit Witch has made no secret of her visit with roamers of a behind closed doors meeting with the Minister for Magic himself before dining out at the exclusive Vue de Monde for drinks. Seemingly at home in the city Fifi underwent a tour of the Auror department before attending the midwinter launch of the Matacore 'Enchantment' line of fashion robes. Speaking exclusively to WWBN Fifi states that she was very pleased to be in Australia and would not commit to any return dates nor roamers that her visit had anything to do with attempts to influence the Australian Ministry to re-think it's ties to Ronald Frump's ministry.

Witch Weekly's exclusive Interview with the well known Hit Witch hits store shelves Monday.

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Sun Jun 26, 2011 12:56 pm
It seems that exposing the Minister of Magic's secret love shack was not enough to keep the host of WWBN's Top Rating News and Current Affairs show Dunena's Mad Mad World set for long. Now with the reveal of Pottermore the controversial host has moved to point fingers at not only the American Minister for Magic but that of a number of major Magical Ministries around the world accusing them of taking bribes to allow unfettered access to the Magical World. Outrage from the claims have lead to a call for a full investigation into Mr Reid's accusations. All Eyes are now on the Various Ministers and how they will respond to the latest revelations from the Man himself, Dunena Reid of Mad Mad World.

After the break WWBN-UK Continues it's round the clock coverage of the 2011 Glastonbury Festival, taking place at Worthy Farm in the UK where our own Cherry Clinger is keeping abreast of the top stories and gossip at iconic music festival with interviews with big names and newcomers alike in the Wrock scene including a exclusive with DJ Noiseworks and former one time Weird Sister Nathan Wright.

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Fri Jun 24, 2011 5:51 pm
"In Global News today many Muggles the world over logged on to the unveiling of 'Pottermore' last night, a new co-production between 'JK', Warner Brothers and Muggle Game Man..Man..Manufacturer Sony. Promising to give Muggles and Wizards alike a whole new experience many prominent figures in the magical world have come out damning what they see as yet another crass profit making exercise at the expense of the magical community.

One Hogwarts teacher has stated that since this 'Pottermore thing' started they have been inundated with well over one thousand owls from worried parents, former students and others wishing to know if it would mean Muggles would be allowed to study at Hogwarts or.. worse the school was to give up it's long held stance amongst the only schools to not have it's own interweb network.

While many in the Wizarding World are concerned Woozle today speaking to WWBN-Japan was quoted as "Not at all Worried" while reminding Wizards and Muggles alike that "whatever Pottermore promises to be there is no doubt that with Sony it will only be a matter of time before hackers get it".

In other news the Australian Ministry of Magic has moved to deny any connection to a self-declaired witch jailed for recklessly causing serious injury and dangerous driving. The Australian Minister for Magic was quoted as calling the woman a 'Bloody Idiot' while reminding that no matter what world one thinks they belong to, the laws of Australia still apply.

This has been Kim Sparkle for WWBN News at Five"

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Tue Jun 14, 2011 5:48 am
"WWBN Today officially announced that it has apologized to American Minister for Magic Ronald Frump for allegations made about him on flagship nightly talk show Dunena's Mad Mad World hosted on WWBN. While the Minister was brought into a furor over recent alligations surrounding his private life it was the revelation of his secret Tuscan Villa that has lead to red faces and claims to 'Sue WWBN for every knurd it has'. Amid the turmoil ratings for WWBN's radio talk show have skyrocketed making it more popular then 'Clives Charms Hour'. Speaking to the head of WWBN it was quoted that 'Whoever Dunena is they're on to a good thing, and might just be the Wizarding Worlds answer to the Muggle World's 'Julian Assange'"
In Depth Report: Dunena's Mad Mad World #3

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Tue Jun 14, 2011 5:25 am
"In local news the Victorian Ministry of Magic are continuing investigations into a alleged House Elf sighting on April 26th in Drouin, a rural town 45 minutes from Melbourne. Witnesses described two ugly children suspected of stealing sneakers and wearing odd headgear. No ministry intervention was required but a number of confused Muggles where reported at the scene.

The Ministry of Magic has issued a reminder for House Elf Owners to take care when in areas where Muggles may be present."

In Depth Report: And at last we will be free, You're a bluebird

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Tue Apr 12, 2011 8:39 pm

"Hello and welcome to WWBN News at Five, I'm Kim Sparkle and now for the headlines."

" 'No News is Good News' Is the word coming down from the Ministry and Re-it.. Re..iterated across the world. We asked The Head of Muggles United for a comment but they where unashamedly silent."

"More bulletins and the latest Quidditch Scores Right After This Break.."

No Story is Too Big or Too Small!
Post your Own News Stories!
Code:

Write Your Story (don't forget to keep it short and snappy for the camera!)
[b]In Depth Report:[/b] [url=link to source thread here (optional)[/url]

"...and in other news a happy occasion as a woman is reunited with her long lost pet Norwegian Ridgeback named Snuffles who flew off after setting fire to her house and those of neighbouring Muggles. The Woman states she is delighted but doesn't understand why her insurance premiums have sky-rocketed after what she claims was just 'a little accident"

"This is Kim Sparkle wishing you a good and safe evening."

"Goodnight."

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View previous topic View next topic Go down  Muggle versus Level One W.O.M.B.A.T: Day of Reckoning [Page 1 of 1]

Post 1 on Wed Nov 16, 2011 4:43 am

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Marty was nothing if not prompt for his six in the morning testing time. Once he received his specific appointment time, in spite of the less than encouraging reminder that he was a Muggle, 'yes I know thank you very much', he made sure his work was caught up, Vincent/Victor had something to work on should McQueen stick her head in the office/lab before he got back from the Ministry of Magic that morning and hibernated in his loft to study one last round before taking the test. He'd even done a practice test he found on line through Woozle.com.wiz.mgc. No, there was a good chance none of those questions would be on it but having gone through it with a timer running actually helped him feel less nervous about the whole thing.

Upon arriving, he checked in at the visitor desk and obtained a badge that must be worn while in there. Apparently the young clerk recognized him from the night of the rally and could not help becoming a bit tongue tied as she tried to assist him with signing in.

"Good morning, Sir.........." she simply stared for a moment. "Oh uhm can I help you?"

"Yes, I have an appointment for the W.O.M.B.A.T. Level I at 6:00 a.m. with Minister Hämäläinen."

She stared.

"Test? Soon? Sign in?" he tried to reminder her.

"Oh uhm, yes, sorry," she apologized passing him the visitor book. "You need to check ... Oh no, no wand. Yes... sorry..." she stared again.

"Pass? Something?" he asked, keeping his calm and hoping he did not end up late thanks to her staring.

"Yes, pass... badge... wear.. all times...."

"Thanks you."

With that, he made his way toward the elevator and took it to the 12 1/2 floor though he wondered as the lift made its way upward if testing by mail might not be an option after that reception. Good thing he had no way of knowing that the young blonde was still staring at the closed doors of the elevator he had boarded. As the doors opened, he could see the duck pond mentioned in the letter. Marty had been intrigued by that and looked up information on it. It seems the fountain had always been there. However, some wizards had gone out for a friend's bachelor party at the turn of the century and gotten quite inebriated. One thing led to another and various spell challenges were issued. Turned out, the winner was the one who remembered that once you transfigure into an animal, unlike an animagus, you cannot transfigure back without having human mentality. The Ministry gave the young men... Err.. Ducks a home in the fountain and they've happily swam there ever since and passed it, finding room 32^3, finding the door opened, he stepped in and introduced himself.

"Sir, I'm Martin Harper. I'm to take the W.O.M.B.A.T. Level 1 this morning."

Post 2 on Wed Nov 16, 2011 8:00 am

Born in Finland Pureblood - A Witch or Wizard with All Pureblood Ancestors usually because of Purest Values against Intermingling with Muggles etc.
:+ : Department of Magical Education
None
English Ministry of Magic
Male Posts : 25
Age : 73
Current Location : Working
Job : Department of Magical Education Careers and Higher Education 'Odd Job Man'
Face Claim : Bill Nighy
Famous Last Words : ..if all else fails there's always openings in the Department of Magical Creatures....as a cleaner.
There was a comfortable routine to the life of Yrjö Hämäläinen, he had, as always arrived at his office in the Department of Education promptly at nine o'clock, read over the stack of jobs palmed off to him from others in the department and spent the first two hours of his morning reading over the final printing of the 2012 Course Guide to be sent out to students in the coming days. The rest of the time he had adjusted his watch, had a cup of tea and checked over the listing and schedule for him to travel to oversee the final NEWT exams to be held over the coming months. Sometimes it did feel to Yrjö that everything in the Education department did at some point fall across his desk, no matter what part of the world there was always someone who said 'Just get Nigel to do it' and thus he was dispatched, briefcase in hand to do well.. whatever it is that needed doing.

So it was that at precisely 10.45 Yrjö put aside his work, adjusted his suit and picked up his briefcase which of course he had already prepared with the items required for the day. He had decided on the cusp of the moment to leave his umbrella for it was only the American Ministry that he was visiting today, hardly worth the effort at all really as he rode the elevator up to the Department of Magical Transportation where his floo connection was waiting. For such a feat of magic it was all rather dull as Yrjö stepped into the fireplace, took a handful of floo powder, clearly enunciated "American Ministry of Magic, New York, United States of America" and tossing the powder was quickly whisked away though the countless dark passages, the entire cross-continental trip taking a whole two minutes to complete what would have been a twelve hour flight had he been traveling by Muggle means.

So it was that precisely two minutes later Yrjö Hämäläinen arrived in the lobby of the American Ministry of Magic, it of course was not his first trip and so he had long grown immune to the 'awe' of the decor nor wonder at it's size nor splendor. In fact he found it rather garish and poorly designed when compared to the recently refurbished Finnish Ministry, if only the Britons had taken the idea of clean white lines and stark lighting to heart rather then clinging to the past when they had rebuilt the Atrium after the war Yrjö would have been a much happier wizard.

He was running a minute behind as he passed the pond with it's ducks, no time to read the small sign advising visitors to not feed the ducks and to most certainly not feed ON the ducks and instead went right on though to the small room that had been set up with tables and chairs ready for the days testing. In many ways it had become the standard that any tests that needed to be done would be pushed onto the Education Department and so it was with luck that not only would there be a Muggle wishing to do W.O.M.B.A.Ts but others here to do the theory part of their Animagus exams, one wishing to qualify for dragon ownership and rest doing the Wizarding University Level Foundation Exams. Yes it was a very busy day in the Ministry of Magic.

Having lined up the quills, spare parchment and of course the clock charmed to hoot at regular twenty-five minute intervals. Yrjö checked over his list and papers ensuring that each matched and handing them to each person as the Wizards came forward to give their name, pay their galleons and take their seats. Of course not all where Wizards and so Nigel did have to allow the slightest show of expression as a man walked in stating that he was the Mr Harper, yes Yrjö had managed to slip him in at the last minute. "Ten Galleons, Quill and Paper are provided on the desk and you will have until the first hoot" It was obvious that Yrjö was running on autopilot as he offered Marty a sealed scroll with his Martin Harper written on it. "You may have reading time until we are ready to begin.." Yrjö just stated as he waited for the last couple of stragglers to come in.



W W B - A d m i n i s t r a t i o n - A c c o u n t : M i n i s t r y - o f - M a g i c / E d u c a t i o n - D e p a r t m e n t
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Post 3 on Wed Nov 16, 2011 8:24 am

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Guest
The sight of Yrjö Hämäläinen was actually comforting to Marty as he reached into his pocket and took out the ten galleons fee for the exam. Thankfully, Vincent had been there when Marty's reply came and offered to head to the Mage Manhattan Wizarding Bank and exchange the Muggle equivalent into galleons for Marty. Yrjö Hämäläinen was very much like the professors Marty had back when he attended CUNY. Sure there were your more outgoing professors but there was always those academic types who were more concerned with their work then being flashy or in fashion. It seemed as if Mr. Hämäläinen was a no nonsense man and that was fine with Marty for now. He was here to test and succeed, if not for his own sake and abilities but for Dominic and Victor and Vincent who had willing helped tutor him from that night till now in the wizarding world. He was determined to pass this and all the following exams he had to take.

Marty took a seat at the desk indicated and gave a quick glance at the questions. No, just as he thought, not the same as the practice one but that was fine. The signal to begin was given and Marty returned to the same 'form' as his college days, focused on his exam and nothing but. The noise of the others did not provide a distraction as he set quill and ink to parchment and proceeded to work his way through the exam. The first few questions were simple enough though he took a moment to consider 6. Which of the following should be most SEVERELY punished by the Wizengamot? Funny how your own experience with an unforgivable can give you such clarity on the direction to go was the fleeting thought that ran through his mind as he made his choice.

He found everyday magic section the easiest to some extent as it was completely a logic related answering system for it once he had studied various spells and items. The one question he spent the most time on was the one regarding more work by the Ministry, after he shoved the 'more instruction to drunk radio show hosts on checking information' option out of his thoughts.

He set down his quill just as the first hoot sounded, picked up his parchment and took it directly to Mr. Hämäläinen.

Post 4 on Wed Nov 16, 2011 9:21 am

Born in Finland Pureblood - A Witch or Wizard with All Pureblood Ancestors usually because of Purest Values against Intermingling with Muggles etc.
:+ : Department of Magical Education
None
English Ministry of Magic
Male Posts : 25
Age : 73
Current Location : Working
Job : Department of Magical Education Careers and Higher Education 'Odd Job Man'
Face Claim : Bill Nighy
Famous Last Words : ..if all else fails there's always openings in the Department of Magical Creatures....as a cleaner.
Taking the gold Yrjö placed it in a envelope which when sealed spat out a receipt which was handed over to the man alongside his test paper. It was all a wonder of quiet efficiency as Yrjö waited until the clock struck six am. He of course was indifferent to the hour, the exams where scheduled for his own comfort and not those of the poor witches and wizards who found themselves forced to attend exams in the middle of the night or early in the morning so as to fit into Yrjö's 9 to 5 scheduled. At six am precisely Nigel spoke up "Good morning my name is Yrjö Hämäläinen and I will be your examiner for today. Please remember that any use of auto-answer quills, rememberalls, detachable cribbing cuffs, self correcting ink and.. " a pause as a distastful expression came over Yrjö's face "mobile.. telephones.. are all banned and will result in a immediate failure" his eyes seemed to be rather focused on Marty, after all the man was a Muggle and not to be trusted. "Those of you who are choosing to do the Wizards' Ordinary Magic and Basic Aptitude Test will have until the first hoot, the rest I will call your names when your time is up".

"You may begin writing" Yrjö said as he tapped the Owl clock with his wand to start counting. It was all very run of the mill as Yrjö signed off the names who had attended and put a mark against one witch who had not. Opening up his briefcase Yrjö took a carefully folded copy of the days Global Voice to read to pass the time, occasionally peeking over it to watch the wizards and Muggle working hard at their tests. This was looking to be a good day for Yrjö where everything went to plan. Indeed twenty-five minutes after he had set the clock going there was a reassuring 'Hoot' and Yrjö put aside his sandwich to take the paper from Mr Harper. "Very good, you may go" Yrjö stated as he took the papers and pushed them into his briefcase where they would languish until later when he put his mind to grading them. It wasn't the most enjoyable job but someone had to do it and so one by one the owl Hooted the end of another interval of time and Yrjö collected the rest of the papers before sending each on their way. Another job for Yrjö Hämäläinen done with the dry efficiency as only the best could manage. That was deserving a cup of tea no doubt before his return to the British Ministry of Magic after dropping off some forms and doing a few other odds and ends to fill out his day.



W W B - A d m i n i s t r a t i o n - A c c o u n t : M i n i s t r y - o f - M a g i c / E d u c a t i o n - D e p a r t m e n t
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