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Fri Mar 08, 2013 12:32 pm
Update from the 2012 WWBN Election Newsroom...

Polls closed just minutes ago but with the expertise of the finest countermonkey's have projected a landslide win for former WWBN Mad Mad World Host Dunena Reid.

Exit poll results give a strong 80% majority result for the newcomer with some even choosing to vote for exotic animals then give a vote to Frump in what has to be his worst result ever.

You heard it here first, Dunena Reid is the new American Minister for Magic!

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Sat Jan 21, 2012 6:52 am
The Magical world today woke to a flurry of Werks and stories after last night's broadcast of Dunena Reid's Weird Weird World hinted, quite strongly that recently crowned Houglass Magazine's Person of the Year Dunena Reid, was set to enter the race for the 2012 American Magical Elections with no lesser sight then the Minister's position currently held by Ronald Frump.

Speaking to the Ministry this morning reporters where told that while some paperwork may have been received it was after the weekend cut-off and would not be looked at until the subsequent week at the earliest.. unless it had fallen on the desk of one F. Blake in which one just had to hope that it would be filed at all.

Considered a possible hoax a interview with Producer and year long associate of Mr Reid Benjamin Jefferson led to the following statement "The hell I know? Trust me man I'm usually the last to find out these things"

More on this story and other top breaking news including the protest by Interweb giants Woozle against Muggle proposed internet filtering laws, after this break.

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Tue Dec 20, 2011 1:05 pm
The Accademia Magica di Italia is proud to announce the hiring of Chudley Canons star player, Jamie Savage as its new professor of Broom Flying Instruction and team quidditch coach. Interim Headmaster Angelo Benito made the announcement at a press conference this morning. He stated that "The school is pleased and grateful that someone of Senore Savage's talent would accept a position like this. The students will benefit greatly from his expertise". Professor Savage has already begun working with the students and the team has their first game soon against Venice Magical Academy.

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Sat Nov 12, 2011 7:22 pm
Our Paris news desk reports that police in Paris have begun searching the Seine River for the body of a man who is believed to have jumped from one of the bridges in a possible suicide attempt. Reported by a party on one of the barges docked along the Seine, this raw footage shot by one of the party goers shows the man plunging into the river. No sign of his exit from the river has been found and they believe that he died on impact.

Next up is....

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Fri Sep 02, 2011 10:23 am
Yes ladies the roamers where true that none other then high flung socialite and darling of the European Ministry Fifi LaRoux has been sighted in Melbourne, Australia which has recently been named the worlds most livable city for a second time.

While none have stated what brought on the arrival of Miss LaRoux there's been no question that the world famous Hit Witch has made no secret of her visit with roamers of a behind closed doors meeting with the Minister for Magic himself before dining out at the exclusive Vue de Monde for drinks. Seemingly at home in the city Fifi underwent a tour of the Auror department before attending the midwinter launch of the Matacore 'Enchantment' line of fashion robes. Speaking exclusively to WWBN Fifi states that she was very pleased to be in Australia and would not commit to any return dates nor roamers that her visit had anything to do with attempts to influence the Australian Ministry to re-think it's ties to Ronald Frump's ministry.

Witch Weekly's exclusive Interview with the well known Hit Witch hits store shelves Monday.

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Sun Jun 26, 2011 12:56 pm
It seems that exposing the Minister of Magic's secret love shack was not enough to keep the host of WWBN's Top Rating News and Current Affairs show Dunena's Mad Mad World set for long. Now with the reveal of Pottermore the controversial host has moved to point fingers at not only the American Minister for Magic but that of a number of major Magical Ministries around the world accusing them of taking bribes to allow unfettered access to the Magical World. Outrage from the claims have lead to a call for a full investigation into Mr Reid's accusations. All Eyes are now on the Various Ministers and how they will respond to the latest revelations from the Man himself, Dunena Reid of Mad Mad World.

After the break WWBN-UK Continues it's round the clock coverage of the 2011 Glastonbury Festival, taking place at Worthy Farm in the UK where our own Cherry Clinger is keeping abreast of the top stories and gossip at iconic music festival with interviews with big names and newcomers alike in the Wrock scene including a exclusive with DJ Noiseworks and former one time Weird Sister Nathan Wright.

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Fri Jun 24, 2011 5:51 pm
"In Global News today many Muggles the world over logged on to the unveiling of 'Pottermore' last night, a new co-production between 'JK', Warner Brothers and Muggle Game Man..Man..Manufacturer Sony. Promising to give Muggles and Wizards alike a whole new experience many prominent figures in the magical world have come out damning what they see as yet another crass profit making exercise at the expense of the magical community.

One Hogwarts teacher has stated that since this 'Pottermore thing' started they have been inundated with well over one thousand owls from worried parents, former students and others wishing to know if it would mean Muggles would be allowed to study at Hogwarts or.. worse the school was to give up it's long held stance amongst the only schools to not have it's own interweb network.

While many in the Wizarding World are concerned Woozle today speaking to WWBN-Japan was quoted as "Not at all Worried" while reminding Wizards and Muggles alike that "whatever Pottermore promises to be there is no doubt that with Sony it will only be a matter of time before hackers get it".

In other news the Australian Ministry of Magic has moved to deny any connection to a self-declaired witch jailed for recklessly causing serious injury and dangerous driving. The Australian Minister for Magic was quoted as calling the woman a 'Bloody Idiot' while reminding that no matter what world one thinks they belong to, the laws of Australia still apply.

This has been Kim Sparkle for WWBN News at Five"

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Tue Jun 14, 2011 5:48 am
"WWBN Today officially announced that it has apologized to American Minister for Magic Ronald Frump for allegations made about him on flagship nightly talk show Dunena's Mad Mad World hosted on WWBN. While the Minister was brought into a furor over recent alligations surrounding his private life it was the revelation of his secret Tuscan Villa that has lead to red faces and claims to 'Sue WWBN for every knurd it has'. Amid the turmoil ratings for WWBN's radio talk show have skyrocketed making it more popular then 'Clives Charms Hour'. Speaking to the head of WWBN it was quoted that 'Whoever Dunena is they're on to a good thing, and might just be the Wizarding Worlds answer to the Muggle World's 'Julian Assange'"
In Depth Report: Dunena's Mad Mad World #3

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Tue Jun 14, 2011 5:25 am
"In local news the Victorian Ministry of Magic are continuing investigations into a alleged House Elf sighting on April 26th in Drouin, a rural town 45 minutes from Melbourne. Witnesses described two ugly children suspected of stealing sneakers and wearing odd headgear. No ministry intervention was required but a number of confused Muggles where reported at the scene.

The Ministry of Magic has issued a reminder for House Elf Owners to take care when in areas where Muggles may be present."

In Depth Report: And at last we will be free, You're a bluebird

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Tue Apr 12, 2011 8:39 pm

"Hello and welcome to WWBN News at Five, I'm Kim Sparkle and now for the headlines."

" 'No News is Good News' Is the word coming down from the Ministry and Re-it.. Re..iterated across the world. We asked The Head of Muggles United for a comment but they where unashamedly silent."

"More bulletins and the latest Quidditch Scores Right After This Break.."

No Story is Too Big or Too Small!
Post your Own News Stories!
Code:

Write Your Story (don't forget to keep it short and snappy for the camera!)
[b]In Depth Report:[/b] [url=link to source thread here (optional)[/url]

"...and in other news a happy occasion as a woman is reunited with her long lost pet Norwegian Ridgeback named Snuffles who flew off after setting fire to her house and those of neighbouring Muggles. The Woman states she is delighted but doesn't understand why her insurance premiums have sky-rocketed after what she claims was just 'a little accident"

"This is Kim Sparkle wishing you a good and safe evening."

"Goodnight."

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Beyond WWB

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View previous topic View next topic Go down   Muggle versus Level Two W.O.M.B.A.T: Dawn of Determination [Page 1 of 1]

Post 1 on Thu Jun 14, 2012 9:53 am

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Once again, Marty found himself taking the subway to a now familiar stop and continuing on the short walk to the offices of the Ministry of Magic for the Level Two W.O.M.B.A.T. testing. He entered, showed both identification and his letter with the assigned date and time to the receptionist. Once signed in and with the visitor tag clipped to his color, Marty went to the bank of elevators, taking the correct one to Floor 12 1/2 where he proceeded to make his way along the hall until he came to the tank of swimming quills. Two steps from there was Room 33^2.

Marty recognized the gentleman at the desk and nodded in greeting as well paying the standard rate of 5 Galleons to cover all materials and then taking his seat at the desk the gentleman indicated to await further instructions.

Post 2 on Sat Jun 16, 2012 4:32 pm

Born in Finland Pureblood - A Witch or Wizard with All Pureblood Ancestors usually because of Purest Values against Intermingling with Muggles etc.
:+ : Department of Magical Education
None
English Ministry of Magic
Male Posts : 25
Age : 73
Current Location : Working
Job : Department of Magical Education Careers and Higher Education 'Odd Job Man'
Face Claim : Bill Nighy
Famous Last Words : ..if all else fails there's always openings in the Department of Magical Creatures....as a cleaner.
Today had not been a ideal day to Yrjö Hämäläinen, his briefcase had broken a latch mid transit causing quite a fuss when he arrived disheveled with half his test papers missing and the rest creased to such a extent that it had been quite a bother to sort and flatten the pages back into their correct shape. Yrjö was a patient man which in the Department of Magical Education made him something of a doormat for whatever jobs could not be passed on to one of the countless interns or work experience students who where idealistic enough to think that they could make a difference from within. Few had beaten the power of the Ministry bureaucracy and even former Madam Undersecretary Professor Dolores Umbridge would have been easily buried by the amount of paperwork generated by each Educational Decree. With or without the pile of work in his inbox Yrjö was almost looking forward to his semi-regular appointment to supervise the day's examinations, his eyes drawn to the fishing pole tucked behind the door so that any superiors would not notice it. Not that such visits where ever common, once a year was about the usual unless there was a change of management. Yrjö tended to be immune to the politics and shuffle within the department which was useful as the time otherwise spent reading the latest procedural to improve efficacy within the department was put to far better use in repairing his aging briefcase, giving it a spit polish for good measure and finding replacement documents for those that had been lost by his morning catastrophe.

There was three appointments in his scheduled today, one cancellation and one that Yrjö had written in his calendar in red, circled, starred, underlined and as yet been unable to get a time organized. It was a bothersome matter Yrjö had been told would be sorted out and yet Yrjö would not trust the words of anyone until he had seen to it himself. However was not going to be today and so running late with only two minutes to spare Yrjö slipped his fishing rod into his briefcase and made for the Floo to take him to the American Ministry of Magic, Yrjö had a later appointment in Canada and he had heard very good things about the salmon and decided that he'd see about doing a spot of fishing after the day's duties. Instead it was fish of a different kind as Yrjö made his way down the corridor past the tank of quills and unlocked Room 33^2 before climbing the ladder two steps to climb into the room. Why they had decided to put the door half way up the wall was anyone's guess but inside Yrjö nodded at another of the interchangeable arrangements of desk and chairs that greeted him from almost every bit of the world where walls where solid and chairs came with four legs.

Unsnapping his briefcase with a certain satisfaction to hear each latch click perfectly Yrjö worked with a quiet efficiency as he sent quills, paper and inkwells to float over to each desk, it was often full house with entry exams overflown from the major Wizarding Universities but at this hour the list was short and to Yrjö it didn't matter if there was one or one hundred to oversee as long as they where quiet and followed the instructions in a orderly fashion. With the door opened to the public Yrjö took his seat and nodded to each Witch or Wizard as they arrived reminding them of the rules and regulations. "Good morning Mr Harper, Wizards' Ordinary Magic and Basic Aptitude Test Level Two today is it?" Yrjö asked in his usual exact manner ignoring the fact that if the exam was held any earlier it might well have been at night. Collecting the galleons he placed them in the box and handed the man the rolled parchment of exam questions and quill. "You may take your seat". There was not too much time to waste and while his day had not started well the other two undergoing examinations arrived promptly and Yrjö was pleased to not be held up by any last minute changes.

"Good morning my name is Yrjö Hämäläinen and I will be your examiner for today. Please remember that any use of auto-answer quills, rememberalls, detachable cribbing cuffs, self correcting ink and.. " the usual expression.. "mobile.. telephones.. are all banned and will result in a immediate failure. Those undergoing remedial Ordinary Wizarding Level's or Level Two Wizards' Ordinary Magic and Basic Aptitude Test Level your reading time will end at the first hoot, all others may begin writing immediately" Yrjö was glad that today was a rather straight forward matter, school visits where usually a more messy event of Headmasters trying to prove their school as the best, teachers and parents trying to charm or bribe examiners to give positive grades and all manner of other hijinks. Yrjö sailed though it all with his usual manner of efficiency, to him it didn't matter how good one was if they did not show their full working out then they would be graded down no matter what.



W W B - A d m i n i s t r a t i o n - A c c o u n t : M i n i s t r y - o f - M a g i c / E d u c a t i o n - D e p a r t m e n t
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Post 3 on Sat Jun 16, 2012 6:54 pm

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"Good morning. Yes, sir," Marty replied to the examiner as he took the test and the quill and found a seat in front. He listened intently, having turned off the mobile before ever entering the ministry and tucking it away in a pocket. The instructions were now familiar to him and he felt less tense then he had the first time around, now having some idea what to expect. Once the instructions were given and reading time begun, Marty read, unhappily. He had learned from the last time that reading time was a British thing but was not used to it as it was not found often in the United States. Finally however, the second hoot sounded and he began writing his answers quickly and efficiently, getting through Part I in decent time.

Post 4 on Thu Jul 12, 2012 4:22 pm

Born in Finland Pureblood - A Witch or Wizard with All Pureblood Ancestors usually because of Purest Values against Intermingling with Muggles etc.
:+ : Department of Magical Education
None
English Ministry of Magic
Male Posts : 25
Age : 73
Current Location : Working
Job : Department of Magical Education Careers and Higher Education 'Odd Job Man'
Face Claim : Bill Nighy
Famous Last Words : ..if all else fails there's always openings in the Department of Magical Creatures....as a cleaner.
While some might have found Yrjö's life to be quite dull there was a zen like efficacy as Yrjö nodded at Mr Harper before going on with his usual drone, the day had only just begin in local terms but for Yrjö it was already heading towards the later part of the afternoon. Watching each candidate take their seat he waited hawk-eyed for any clues of cheating or writing ahead of time.. grounds for suspension and loss of all fees along with quite a bit of embarrassment for whomever was so foolish to try and fluke their way though on Yrjö's watch. There was telling signs, the sweat, overconfidence, a frown on a face or glancing around in a manner that was most untrustworthy. Yrjö noted that one of the ladies seemed to be glancing towards one spot on the floor near her foot, a curious behavior. Time ticked by with the excruciating slowness that only a examination can produce. At the first hoot Yrjö took a moment to stand up and pronounce that "All those with remedial Ordinary Wizarding Levels or Level Two Wizards' Ordinary Magic and Basic Aptitude Test you may now begin writing" his chair squeaking quite loudly on the stone floor as he sat down again, a ruffle of newspaper to distract from his watching of the young nervous witch as he watched her over his copy of the Daily Prophet.

So much for a simple open and shut case, Yrjö glanced from one witch to the other's in the room, Mr Harper was busy writing.. nothing out of the ordinary there but in the last row was a rather intense looking old wizard who had come in for a W.O.M.B.A.T exam. Yrjö had thought it rather out of the ordinary for a wizard to want to undergo the exam at a rather advanced age but as his eyes moved from the wizard to the witch a theory emerged. Each time the witch seemed about to write the man would look intensely at his page and quickly write his own answer, the woman would then glance to the floor before writing on the supplied parchment. A most clever piece of fraud was being undertaken, had it been any other assessor they might well have gotten away with it but one had to stay up all night to get the best of Yrjö Hämäläinen. There was of course a procedure for what was to be done next, Yrjö put aside his newspaper and wrote a brief..but concise Memo to the security department to arrange two Wizards to wait outside the room for the troublesome pair. It was such a disappointment, why people would endeavor to cheat when one simply had to study the required material was beyond Yrjö, it was not after all difficult to give up ones evening in the pursuit of a lifetime of relative comfort so how people would chose to spend their evenings otherwise was unfathomable, one was better to fail then to cheat by all accounts when the zero tolerance policy was in some respects rather 'creative' in terms of punishments.

One only had to look at the tank of swimming quills to learn the technique most popular in the late 1930s for dealing with students who dared to cheat on their NEWT examinations. Yrjö tried his best to not interfere with the rest of the people who where doing their examinations properly and with honor, his chair squeaked a little as he got up and walked to the door, opening it just enough to let his flying memo zoom out into the hallway. Now it was a matter of waiting until the end of the examination time, Yrjö was calm, it wasn't his first run in with a cheater and certainly not the most dramatic scene to play out in his years of crisscrossing the world to oversee one final exam or another. His mind was focused on the time in South Africa when he'd been cursed for giving a young boy a bad grade, a spell in St Mungo's did not reduce his zeal that no matter how well you could gut a lizard it had no bearing on presenting a solid case for whether or not the Goblin Rebellion of 1612 was due to poor quality food and hygiene. So caught up in thought he was that before he knew it his clock was hooting the end of the first set of exams. "Quills down for all those undergoing the Level Two Wizards' Ordinary Magic and Basic Aptitude Test, those undergoing remedial Ordinary Wizarding Levels you have twenty minutes to go" the young witch was clearly uncomfortable now as Yrjö gestured for Mr Harper and the old Wizard to turn in their parchments and leave... well for one of them anyway.. if all had gone right the Wizard.. Yrjö checked over his papers to get the name 'Ah.. a Mr Brickston-Wagg' would not be going very far at all.



W W B - A d m i n i s t r a t i o n - A c c o u n t : M i n i s t r y - o f - M a g i c / E d u c a t i o n - D e p a r t m e n t
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Post 5 on Fri Jul 13, 2012 8:24 am

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Marty finished up Part I and proceeded on to Part II, completely resisting the urge to laugh at the first two questions. So that was now officially part of wizarding history considering the events were now questions on NEWT exams. From there, he continued on to the rest of the questions, finishing up a few minutes before the hoot that signaled the end of his testing period and spending that time double checking his answers to be sure he had not left anything out. At the call to turn in papers, he returned the exam to Nigel and left, completely clueless to the events that had been going on in the room between the young witch Nigel had been watching and the older wizard who was also testing for second level NEWTs.

Marty was, however, rather familiar with the stance that the two security wizards were holding as he left the room. First thoughts to his mind were to the affect of Oh shit not aga.... but were quickly dispelled as they simply smiled and nodded a greeting to Marty and let him pass. From the sounds of a quick scuffle and the protestations of the elder wizard behind him, Marty realized that the other man was not quite so lucky. Having 'been there, done that', the night of the rally, Marty did what served his best interests -- made his way to the elevators and exit!

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