Face Down In The Mud

Jamie was feeling like crap and was feeling very cold no not cold freezing like i was covered in ice cold water come to think of it he did feel very wet. Jamie went to open his eyes but quickly slammed them closed he's head was now pounding and he felt a little sick. Yep Must have over done it
This bed was really hard and cold he rolled over so he was facing up an force his eyes open
"ITs Fu*ing Bright " Jamie grumbled then looked around only to discover he was not in a bed but a field in the mud
"Brilliant" Jamie said as he tried to sit up only to fall back down. feeling very green around the gills
"he went feeling around in his mud cover jacket and pulled out a hip flask open it and took a swig of the bourbon in side.
"ahh better" the mud and sleep taste was replaced by the pleasant taste of booze.
Jamie sat up slowly and took a better look around it was a large field of mstly mud and green grass and just a cross the way was a road beyond a wire fence
"Where the hell am I" Jamie asked as he stood up and fumbled around looking for his wand to cast a cleaning spell and made his way to the road in hopes of catching as he really did feel up to appraising from unknown place while hung over.
wand out spell cast he was just at the fence when...

"...Peut-être que j'ai besoin de réadaptation
Ou peut-être simplement besoin de sommeil.."^

The lines where going round and round Fifi's head, what day was it? What month was it? Fifi's head was aching.. there had been something about.. about fire.. yes.. and Llamas.. and .. nope it was gone... or maybe..maybe not. She'd spoken to someone, then there had been a meeting and her boss..or keepers.. they where like keepers and didn't seem that pleased with her. What had she done? Trying to adjust her sunglasses she found that her hand was stuck.. why? why was it stuck? and why did she feel wet and cold and unable to move? Fifi looked down... oh.. maybe it was because her body was stuck? lost in the mud while her head was just above the earth. "Quel bordel!*" Fifi swore, her cloths where sure to be filthy and how on earth was she going to get out?

The second question naturally was how on earth she'd gotten there in the first place? 'Let's see.. Je was in America.. home of many badly dressed stupid people.. then there was the meeting.. in Vancouver..yes.. they wanted to know how I'd gone with.....something.. then Je wen't to Gringotts to get payment for .. something.. Je was going to go to that cute bouquet store in le Marais' so why.. was she now stuck in what she could just about guess was some kind of field?

Then.. she heard a voice.. oh. so that answered question number 3.. if she was alone. He sounded English and rather in a situation not unlike her own. "Excusez-moi! Can you help me s'il te plaît?" Fifi asked as she slowly started to squirm her fingers trying to free them enough to get to her wand. She remembered her wand yes, and cigarettes.. but what did they have to do with Llamas.. and she had been at a telephone in Paris and why hadn't she used her own phone? No wonder her head was aching, her mind was full of jigsaw pieces.. she must have forgotten to take her tonic. Maybe that was why her boss had been angry.. had she done something? That was the all encompassing question number 4. If only she could just get to her wand.. maybe then she would be able to better position herself against the fifth mystery.. who was the Englishman.. and what did he want with her? .. or was it something she was supposed to have done? Alas Fifi just couldn't put it together in her mind, she'd have to bide her time and hope that the Englishman was as stupid as he looked and didn't turn out to be a threat.

^Maybe I need some rehab
Or maybe just need some sleep

*What a mess

wand out spell cast he was just at the fence when...
Jamie heard a voice calling to him in what sounded like french Jamie looked around and could see nothing this darn light he search in his pockets and pull out his rounded industrial punk and put them on.
"Ello Madame ont été êtes-vous ?" Jamie called out putting his french to use this did not look like france but then again most of france he had seen was from his broom or from under a bar so what would he know.
"Je ne peux pas vous voir" jamie called and kept looking when he saw what he thought was a head sticking out of the ground.
Jamie shock his head
"man i must have had a bigger night than i thought "Jamie turned and serviced the fence to see if there was an easier way of getting out with out climbing over it


(translation Madam were are you?
i can not see you )

"Oh, merde!" Fifi swore, this man was dumber then he looked "Ai am over 'ere you fool!" Fifi cried out in annoyance, curse Englishmen who did think that being able to string a few words of French together did make them sophisticated. Really to Fifi it just made them annoying. "Maybe if oi did spend more time looking with ones eyes rather then trying to state the obvious you would!" No it really wasn't a pleasant nor dignified situation she'd found herself in and made all the worse for the fact that she was stuck and unable to remember how she had ended up here with this person in a field. "You must have had a bigger night.. what about Ai? Now come help Moi out before someone.. some idiot comes along" Fifi almost slipped and said Muggle for a moment, but of course so far she couldn't tell if this foolish Englishman was Muggle or magical.

Her head really was pounding and Fifi couldn't remember the last time she'd eaten or slept "Oi Connard!^ Don't you walk away.. if you do Ai shall personally make it the last thing you ever do you hear me?" Fifi was desperate "Ai shall curse you to Brûle en enfer* forever you hear moi!" Okay so maybe threatening complete strangers was a little out of vogue but Fifi was in a bad mood, she couldn't remember something important and it was bugging at the edge of her mind just as she could feel mud filling her handmade shoes. They where sure to be totally ruined! There was however something annoyingly familiar about the moron, she'd seen him before somewhere but couldn't quite put her finger on it. "You are famous yes..but why?" Her mind was foggy, just what had she taken and why couldn't she think straight. "Oi Alvin Je vous souhaite étaient ici..**" Fifi said to herself, her loyal House Elf would be bound to put everything right, he always did.


^Idiot

*Burn in Hell

**Alvin I wish you where here

Marty was hiking along the bushlands outside of Drouin in the state of Victoria, Australia in a very cheerful mood despite the winter weather. Summer heat was not his favorite thing and considering the latest weather report for New York City, he was quite happy to be where he was. He was here for work aka smokingllama.com to investigate some reports of strange 'and really ugly midgets disappearing and reappearing at will' in the town. Nobody he talked to really seemed to know anything about them but said that they had been spotted out in the country areas near a private school. What Marty was not expecting was to hear a woman shouting in French and while he did not speak French, it did sound like she might need help?

Following the sound of the voice, he came upon not just the woman but a man as well who seemed to be trying to ... Marty blinked as he realized the woman was buried up to her neck. Normally one to allow scientific proof and logic to reign, he skipped the scientific part and went to the logic, especially after hearing

"Ai shall curse you to Brûle en enfer* forever you hear moi!"

So the logic was
a) she was buried in mud to her neck
b) the dude was not and was try to leave
c) she was angry and cursing the dude... Marty may not have spoken French but he could translate 'pissed off' rather well

Ergo... it was the dude's fault.

"How dare you!" he called out running toward the man trying to climb over the fence. "I'll get you out, miss as soon as I take care of him!" With that, Marty tried to grab the man by the collar and punch him in the nose.

Jamie was sure he was durlisunal when he saw a speaking french in the middle of a field that he ignored it as it/she got angry at him walking a way.
When he hared yet another voice some what angry Yelling at him it ( the voice) addressing the head at that Jamie turned around just in time to see the man with some what shaggy hair about to hit him. Jamie ducked Putting his qudditch skills to use

"Wow Pal ummm" raising his hands in a i surrender Jester
"Umm you can see the head?" What a stupid Question "Of course you can " Jamie side stepped the shaggy hair angry man in a move that would have looked very impressive on a broom
"Sorry Love thought you were figment of my Hangover I mean you... do look like... a bit ... well." Jamie was not sure what happen to the sentence but it went no were

"like how did this happen" Jamie kneeled down next try to think if he knew her as they were in the same field may be they came here together
I do hope shaggy hairs man not with us tho

This was all very unfortunate to Fifi's eyes. Had the moron helped her out she'd have been quite fine, the next best thing of course would have been to be left alone where she might in time wiggle as to reach her wand and apparate her way out but now with this person here she wasn't about to risk her job on being charged with performing magic in front of Muggles. If he was a Muggle that was, Fifi couldn't see herself ending up in a situation involving Muggles but you never did know after all.

Alas the situation was going to get more surreal as Fifi (who had previously been more focused on abusing the unnamed Englishman) suddenly heard a third voice shout out. "Oi how wonderful ain' American come to save le day" Fifi commented sarcastically as she rolled her eyes, such displays of machismo did not impress here and neither of the men seemed to have gotten on to the important point which was getting here the hell out of this mud!
From her rather low vantage point there wasn't that much to see.. mostly legs and feet though she couldn't help but notice the way the Englishman moved.. her memory stirring until one piece of the puzzle clicked into place "You.. Ai know you.. you are that one from the team.. something..something.. ah Ai almost 'av it". Something about.. Quidditch, yes.. she had seen him before at one of the matches her boss had taken her to. England had not faired well if she remembered correctly.

"Debile you could not afford my love even if ai was to wish to sell it" Fifi said quite crossly as she waited, but at least they weren't about to leave her alone in this field. Though she wasn't entirely sure that was a good thing. "Well w'at?" Fifi demanded, she didn't like idle chit chat and the man had already wasted far too much of her time with his foolishness. Fifi had to assume there was people looking for her and if not La'Fonz was sure to need a walk and a bath. Giving the man a tittering laugh as he asked what had happened Fifi didn't know but she assumed that at some point she'd gone about setting her portkey to return home and must have gotten the values wrong. Although just how wrong she was unsure of at the moment and finding herself amongst a Englishman and a American was not doing much to clear up matters. "Oh it iz really quite the simple.." then Fifi glanced upwards and remembered the foolish American.. no doubt he was Muggle by the stupid look of his face. "Ah.. never the mind now 'ould you please get me out of this disgusting 'ole?" Fifi asked yet again. Hoping that double the number of men would mean one of them would be bound to actually do something rather then looking at her like she was some kind of illusion.

Marty would have continued to fight but if there was no fight, then that was even better as it gave him more time to get the woman out of her predicament. He was rather glad to hear that, in this particular case of deduction, he was wrong. He was not glad to hear that apparently, the other man thought she was a figment of his imagination until Marty confirmed her existence. "Yes, of course I can see the head," he muttered back, dropping his backpack and quickly opening it to get out the camp shovel he carried. "And I can see we need to get her out of there," Marty added as he made his way over to where the young French woman was neck deep in mud and began quickly but carefully digging some of the mud away from around her shoulders so they could get a hold of her to pull her out there. Although considering the previously supposed but proven not to be villian of the piece was now just kneeling in the mug at the fence where Marty left him, Marty suspected the 'they' was fast becoming 'he'.

Jamie was crawling over to the head in the mud trying to decided if he could use use magc to get her out and ask her if they had arrived here in this muddy field together or not.
"so lets dig you out" Jamie started moving the earth with his hands
" ya know i woke up over there just now" jamie said a casually as he could trying to see if they had [anything to say
man he just cleaned his jacket
"Yep i am on a team" Jamie said in a cryptic way not to sure what to say just in case one of them of a Muggle and he said to them before he woke up.
"your not stuck vertically are you?" Jamie asked knowing that if she was this could be a long dig with out magic.
man what is i just magically get her out and if i have obligate them after Jamie kept digging as the toughs crossed his mind.

"Da head! Da head? Ai am not just some old head!" Fifi called out in annoyance, why if any of that European paparazzi was here there would no doubt be a full two page spread with her name on it. Being stuck neck deep in mud rather limited your choices of things to do so Fifi was left to just listen and watch what little she could from her uncomfortable vantage point. "That' is what Ai 'av been saying!" Fifi said to back up the odd American, dear Merlin had it not been for the cold she was sure they (for was it a they?) had ended up in some backwater part of hell.. better known as America.

Turning her attention back to the Quidditch player Fifi raised her eyebrow "Are you any good?" the obvious question, well okay that and the 'did we.. or didn't we?' but Fifi preferred to live life without asking those kinds of questions, looking back on things always tended to make complications and Fifi hated complications. That and she was rather disgusted at herself, clearly this man was mentally incapacitated "What do you think?" she responded rudely when he asked how she was stuck, Fifi could feel pins and needles in her toes, she had been very lucky to not hit a rock but the Magic had no doubt moved a nice 'Fifi shaped' pile of earth deep into the ground from where she'd landed.

"W'at on earth is that?" Fifi asked the American on sighting some strange metal thing in his hand. If only she had her hands free she could have taken him but instead she was left to try and bite before realizing with relief that the man was removing some of the horrible mud. "Do be careful this blouse is one of a kind" Fifi said starting to shiver as she realized that not only where her clothes soaked but they where entirely inappropriate for the cold of..wherever they where. Setting her head back she could see strange metal pylons and somewhere there was the sound of automobiles so clearly somewhere they're had to be Muggles and café's and coffee.. that's all Fifi wanted right now, a bath, a change of clothes and a coffee so large you could swim in it. None of which this field seemed able to provide at all.

At the trapped woman's question, between her bright repartee with the athelete, Marty explained, "A folding shovel. I can dig you out with this." It did not surprise him that she might not know what a shovel was as he had met many native Manhattan dwellers who had never had need to use one.

Marty concentrated on digging, his first goal to free the woman's arms and hopefully the mud was still soft enough he could pull her out carefully. As he worked, he could hear the discussion between the other two and began to think that perhaps they might not be together, mostly based on the fact that he was sure the woman would have killed Mr. Sports Jock by now had she been in his company with her arms free for over five minutes. Marty was basing this on his own desire to at last knock the jock unconcious. Some people lived to prove stereotypes true. So far Mr. Sports Star was doing quite well in that department.

"I'll do my best, miss," he promised at her command to be careful near her blouse though he could see that not only was it one of a kind it was way too thin for Australian winter. Whoever had got her into this predicament must have taken her coat was his logical deduction just as he had enough mud dug away to set down the shovel and reach under her arms to slowly pull her out so as not to hurt her. "On three, miss? Ready? One... two... and three," he counted and began pulling once she said she was ready.

Jamie kept digging as the woman asked if he was any good
"Of course i am good i on the national english team for next year" Jamie said rather upset that she would imply he was a bad payer
He lost track of a lot of what the woman was saying to the man with the shovel then they had free her arms and got ready to pull her out but it was then that jamie saw her blouse and a flash of memory
"we were at that bar together" Jamie could not think on the name or remember much more well he remembered the blouse and undoing the buttons.
" so on three then" Jamie looked up at the shaggy haired man.
Jamie could not remember more of what happen that the few glimpse of the night before but he was sure some thing had happen between him and the lady in the ground.

"Ai see" Fifi said to the American, in a voice that clearly showed that she didn't understand in the least, but that didn't matter because as long as she got out of the hole she didn't care one bit how. Fifi was naturally not all that fond of mud nor of anything that was liable to stain and ruin her artfully picked outfit. It was difficult for her not to scream as the man dug the shovel into the earth, people wielding metal objects that could well remove her head as much as free her. Fifi was forever one who was self reliant and so being in a situation where she had to lower herself to asking for help from a American no less was liable to put her in a bad mood for a good week or more.

"Mhm.. National Team.. ah very good.." Fifi said feigning boredom before looking up at the American, a pity he was so American and old and well.. round about the middle or she might have considered him worth a second look. There was something about him that reminded her of one of those pug dogs that waddled about with a wet nose all the time. Enduring but no she wasn't that drunk to have her standards lowered to such a level. Of course it wasn't to say that she wouldn't.. Fifi tossed her head to look at the other one, her sunglasses sitting lopsided on her nose from the movement. Ohdear. Had she had her hands free she'd have checked that her underpants where on the right way round but alas she was stuck and had to assume the worse. "Yes well, Ai have had better.. MUCH better!" she responded automatically, of course she couldn't remember anything but no doubt if it had been spectacular she'd have a harder time forgetting right?

With a man either side of her Fifi nodded "Just do get on with it yes?" she said before bracing as the other one took hold of her, taking a deep breath she knew this wasn't going to be enjoyable and tried not to look at the state of herself as the men pulled her out of the hole. It was lucky that Fifi was quite a small woman otherwise it might well have taken a whole lot longer. "Uuck.. Disgusting" Fifi said as she sat for a moment in the mud checking that her watch was safely around her neck and her wand was in her hand.. automatically she started to move her wrist to charm her clothes clean when she remembered that the American was quite possibly a Muggle. Foolish mistake! She could have gotten in real trouble for that and with a sigh looked down at her ruined clothes, just how did Muggles deal with these kind of situations anyway?

Marty had no idea what sport this guy was a player in but he hoped the guy was at least half as good as he was claiming to be or at least had enough strength to help pull the young woman out. He resisted the urge to smirk when she informed the man that she had 'much better' then he, at whatever it was she had with him. With the go ahead that she was ready, the count given, the pair pulled her slowly from the mud, doing his best to insure she was not injured by their help. Upon freeing her from her predicament, the condition of her clothing did not escape Marty and, oddly enough, rather than give him "ideas", it gave him ideas of a more useful nature such as pulling out the emergency blanket in his backpack and offering it to the woman to wrap around herself against the chill. "It's damp and cold and you don't need to become sick," he offered, refraining from asking why she held a branch in her hand and just figuring it was 'a french thing of some sort. "I've got some coffee.. If you'd like some?" he offered her, pulling out the thermos. "You're not injured or hurt? There's a coffee shop in the town... Really nice woman runs it..." he sort of rambled, explaining where he had filled thermos and not sure what to do next. She seemed young enough that if he had had a daughter or niece, well this woman would be that age. Amazing what protective nature it can bring out.

Jamie was in shock
she had better BETTER
Jamie had helped pull her out on auto pilot, afterward he reached for his flask and took a long drink.
"you know if I knew you were going to insult me I would have left you in the ground"Jamie strode up and looked around he had really know idea were the hell he was so time to ask the strange Muggle idiot with the coffee.
" which way to this town and what town is that anyway?" Jamie asked
"and by the way you umm may be you should learn to fly better cause I know I not pulling you out the next time" Jamie said to her not wanting to admit that he may have been drunk and not that good last night, and that he had no idea who she was or what her name is.
He was so glad he had cast his cleaning charm before the Muggle showed up were as she had to stay all dirty. Very dirty.

Well at least she had managed to get that big talking English Quidditch player to be quiet for the moment. Fifi didn't have time to gloat however as it became clear that there was no dignified way to emerge from a muddy hole without well.. being covered in mud and rather looking like you'd been stuck in a hole for the last however many hours. Standing up proved a little more difficult as not only where her shoes full of mud but her legs had fallen asleep, moving from side to side restlessly she avoided the Quidditch player but instead looked utterly confused as the American pulled something large and shiny from his backpack. "Yes, Ai was aware of that" Fifi interjected automatically when he pointed out that it was both damp and cold before her mouth made a slight 'o' at the idea of her catching a chill. She'd never thought of that since of course it was always a simple matter of taking a simple pepperup potion.. but she guessed Muggles just had to live with every cold and ache.. strange things that they where. The metal sheet making strange rustling sounds as she wrapped it about her, "Ah.. it is way of making invisible yes?" she asked looking down at the reflective metal. Shuffling it over her head she had the inkling of a idea before realising that as far as invisibility cloaks went.. this Muggle invention was woefully inadequate. "Useless.." she fumed throwing it aside, now she would have to think of something else if she couldn't simply disappear and run away. "Ai am as well as can be expected" Fifi said unsure, for sometimes it could be a good hour before she'd notice the cuts or scars of a rough night. "You have ah automobile yes?" Fifi asked as she tucked her wand into her blouse before looking at the strange canister. It was funny how one moment there was nothing you could want more then a big cup of coffee but the next the rough night of apperataining drinking and whatever else she had done rushed to the fore and Fifi clutched her hand over her mouth from the gag reflex... oh this was one horrible horrible start to the day.

Then of course Mr English Quidditch player just had to speak up. "Well that would hardly be a change from the other disappointment" Fifi said with spite in her voice. Her eyes glared at him when he went on about Flying.. what a fool! She hadn't flown here she'd used a portkey and what kind of moron spoke about flying in front of Muggles anyway? "Ai have no idea what you are talking about" Fifi lied before turning her back on the pair "Ai have clothes.. over there.." Fifi glanced at a nearby bush that didn't really have much of anything except that it would be just far enough to be 'away' from the Muggles view. "I will be but ah moment.. do not turn around or peek or Ai will be most unkind." That one at least wasn't a lie, her Trainer at the Auror department had banned her from using mind spells on the fact that she tended to be a bit too 'forceful' leaving her training partner with a migraine that took two days at St Mungo to be rid of. Stalking off though the wet grass she glanced back to make sure nobody was looking then stripped off, did a cleaning spell that while not as good as a shower at least was better then nothing before doing the same to her clothes and transfiguring them to look different.. regretting the fact that they would never quite be the same again. Still tucking her shirt in as she picked her way back towards the others she nodded "You did mention coffee?" her stomach had quickly moved from the hungry to sick to right back to being hungry again and maybe she would be able to tell where they where better at this Cafe and escape from this horrible muddy wherever they where.

"Uhm, no..." Marty responded, a bit confused at Fifi's reaction to the blanket. "A way of staying warm and, uh... yes, well covering up?" As she tossed the blanket back at him, he fumbled a bit before folding it, and answered her next question. "Car? Yes, I have a vehicle. It's parked just down the road a bit but not far. I had just started out on my hike." Okay, so the two wizards weren't the only ones with secrets since Marty did not always announce his connections to SmokingLlama.com. With having been informed that Fifi somehow had a change of clothes over towards where some bush was, he turned and refrained from looking in that direction as she set about utilizing the clothing she had there. Maybe she had been camping here? He wasn't sure though he did wonder how a woman of her apparent taste had ended up with the sports jock that seemed to be full of himself, considering his comments about various things. Apparently, he was also full of some liquid refreshment as Marty observed him drinking from a flask. "Town is not far. Only a few miles if you go straight across the fields," Marty responded to the athlete's question, indicating the direction. "And it's Drouin, Victoria, Australia," he replied to the second question.

Within minutes, Fifi returned looking for coffee. "Yes, coffee," he confirmed, handing her a now poured cup of the brew and offering. "I can then take you to the cafe in town if you would like?"

Jamie was looking in direction of the town as the woman wonder off to do some magic a way from the Muggle.
Man i should just start walking to town or just far enough to apparate back to London and home to try and remember what the hell had happen or maybe just not bother she did not seam to be the kind of woman he'd end up seeing again unless they get drunk and happen to be in the same bar.
Right like that would happen again
"Ya know not a big coffee drinker" Jamie said he was not going to stay clearly he and the unknown woman were not going to spend any more time together and Jamie really did want to she really did not seem his type so what stay were your not wanted there war plenty more fish in the sea and then as he did not know what day it was he might have training.
Jamie could not afford to miss any more they coach was getting a bit pissed off by his drunken behavior but he still played well and was need.
so here he was miles from anywhere and need to get to London
"well I'm going to go now find a way back to an actuarial content and out of the colonies" Jamie turned and walked in the direction of the Muggle man had pointed.
Until he is away from the Muggles eyes and pop back to London.

"But this thing is hardly thick as a wafer?" Fifi pointed out when the man said the strange Muggle blanket thing was to keep her warm. Fifi did have to bat a eyelash in surprise when Marty explained the real (or at least to her) reason was to 'cover up'. How curious! Why he must have been pédé to even think such a thing. After all what kind of man would not want to look at a mud soked woman? Many back in her home country would have dreamed to see her in such a state but of course it wasn't the man's fault that he was completely ignorant as to who she was, no doubt he'd never even heard of Playwizard Magazine. A shame, the photographer had been particularly 'artistic' that day. Crossing her arms Fifi nodded glad that the Muggle seemed to not be stranded like herself and whatever-his-name-was. "Hiking?" Fifi said her expression one of thinking that it was sure to be distasteful to involve being in mud and carrying shovels.

Either way Fifi was glad of a moment to be rid of the two strangers, her head was full of scraps of memory, things half recalled, the urge to dwell over them until she was liable to want to rip her skull in half in order to get to the thoughts so she could lay them all out to make sense of. Of course that didn't really work and usually she just ended up raging about her apartment before passing out no more enlightened then she was before. Glancing over her shoulder as she pulled her shirt off Fifi half expected Mr English to be watching but no he was gone. Dropping her hand Fifi tried to figure out if she should be disappointed, she wasn't used to such a lack.. of attention. She must truly be off the map to end up with not one but two men who hadn't seen her picture in The Daily Prophet or on the cover of Witch Weekly. Mind you the publicity was a double edged sword, on one hand it helped the Ministry to have high profile Hit Wizards to try and fix their tarnished image after the war but it was a uneasy feeling to find yourself stared down by your own image on every street.

"Australia? mon dieu..no zat cannot be right" Fifi said overheating a snatch of the conversation between the two men.. she wouldn't have made that much of a mistake right? Digging out her watch Fifi swore to find it chocked solid with mud. "Fils de pute.. this cannot be.." Fifi shook the item putting it to her ear as she turned the nob but there was no sound of clockwork. It was stuck solid, set to some horrible field in Australia. If this was Australia, Fifi was skeptical as she put her watch away and sipped on the coffee instead.. it was far too bitter but not quite as horrible as she'd expected from a American. "I guess I have no choice.. " Fifi muttered nodding that she would go with.. whoever he was before spitting a string of curses at Jamie as he walked away. "Typical Englishman.. all mouth and no spine" Fifi said with a huff, "Now shall we be gone from here?" Fifi asked offering the man back his cup, she'd seen enough of this field for a life time and in the back of her mind was the worry that she would be stranded in this place for there was hardly likely to be a magical watchsmith around to repair her portkey. Maybe if she was lucky she'd be able to 'explain' the matter to the local Ministry.. Fifi tried to remember if she'd heard anything about Australia lately that would mean they would be less then welcoming to their European counterpart. "So what is it you do? Apart from this Hiking in fields?" Fifi asked just to make conversation as she followed him to the car, of course if he asked her the same she'd just lie and say she was a escort, it was the one occupation she'd found that never did raise any deep questions when she refused to go into detail.

"Well, yes," Marty answered and continuing to explain. "There's some places a vehicle just can't go and you miss to much if you're searching for small signs and marks." It seemed the Brit was in a hurry to leave not only this area but the land as well. "Well," Marty told him, "Best bet is train into Melbourne where the airport is then," of course, having no clue that either were magical and would have other means to get out of Australia because magic did not exist.

*Pats Marty's head condescendingly as Marty glares and shoves her away* All right all right! Where were we? Oh yes, the field.

So Marty watched the gentleman (using the term in his mind rather loosely as far as the British athlete was concerned considering the man's behaviour toward the poor young woman and her predicament) depart as Fifi returned, muttering in what appeared to be sorrow over her watch. "Perhaps the woman at the coffee shop can recommend someone to fix it?" he asked, "Just seems to need a good cleaning."

Marty had to agree with Fifi's description of the departing athlete. "Yes, let's get you to town where you can get some good coffee and perhaps some food if you are hungry?" Pointing in the direction of the car, they began the short walk to the vehicle as she asked about him. "Oh, research projects and scientific investigation," he answered, which was very true just he was not quite forth coming on exactly what topics he researched. "My name is Martin Harper. Usually just Marty to friends. And may I ask your name?"

"Ai see.. " Fifi said looking at Marty suspiciously, his words didn't sound too far from what was her ahem.. occupation. Fifi was tempted to pry further but then of course such it could backfire into him being inquisitive about her own interests in such things. "Humph" Fifi said disapprovingly as she watched the Englishman walk off, she would never have expected that she would one day chose a ride with a American over one who was at least European. It wasn't that Fifi was racist but more that she well.. didn't like any country that thought burgers dripping of lard and consisted of so many overweight people was anything worth admiring. There was no doubt too that the political situation between the French and American ministry where not at their best with more then a few accusations flying each way as to who was a bigger do-nothing during the war. The war had been good for her career if nothing else, many of the Death Eaters had been opportunistic, overconfident that they're side would win. Dangerous though her job was there never was quite the thrill of following the trail until you found one. Then the height of it all, trailing the target until that one moment where they slipped, a opening presented itself and she striked!

So very far that seemed from where she was now, even her watch would not work and of course the American would wish to help. If only he knew that it would take more then a clean to get her portkey working again "Ai doubt it.. but merci bien for the thought" Fifi said to Marty with a sigh as he suggested asking some waitress at a coffee shop for assistance. This town was surely not large enough to hold a magical quarter and without one her chances of finding a jeweler knowledgeable in the arts of magic where naught. Of course the name Melbourne was connected to Matacore and even in France she had heard of that venture but never in a million years would she step foot in that store, well without a sizable sum of gold to pay for her endorsement of course!

"Hungry.. yes Ai guess one must be" Fifi said half to herself as she took one last glance at the hole she'd been dug out of before turning her back on the field as if it had personally insulted her and striding off after the man. Fifi had to admit it was surprising to her that the American seemed to be very much into a field that was close to her own heart.. or used to be anyway for much of her work these days fell under the realm of the political. Fifi never asked too many questions of the files her boss gave her and they in turn rarely batted a eyelid at her expense reports. It was a relationship that worked well for her as it seemed so far was this one with Marty as he introduced himself. "Fifi LaRoux.. and Ai am afraid aI don't really have any Ai would call ..friends" she admitted with a shrug. Did that matter to her? Maybe, but what could you expect when your mind was damaged and trust was a very hard thing to come by in her line of work.

No, she probably didn't see, thought Marty to himself but that was okay. Most scientists had these massive laboratories and staff to work with them and don't forget the backing of major corporations. SmokingLlamas.com was not quite that large though it did seem to have quite excellent financial backing, though Marty had no idea who was supplying the backing. For all he knew, it could have been Victoria McQueen herself. However, his work was paid for, supplies were obtained whenever he asked for something specific and the foundation continued on. Hearing her sound of disdain, at first Marty thought it might have been at his occupation but then, when he looked, realized it was directed at the departing British athlete.

"Well, maybe Miss.... Tiffany," he suggested, trying to remember the woman at the coffee shop's last name but failing, just remembering it was longish, "Will know of some place that can help. At least at the Coffee Shop we can get you some food and hot coffee. It's good food, I had a really good hummus wrap there yesterday." Okay, yes, Marty was rambling a bit and yes, he does like hummus. Sure he grew up in Nutley and had burgers at the diners with his friends. Even went to the Macca's when it opened in the neighboring town. But living in The Village since finishing college had widened and improved his variety of foods he liked.

As she introduced herself, and then added her self admission of not having many friends, Marty couldn't understand why a young woman like her would not. Of course, he was not aware of her occupation but even then, he probably would have wondered. "I'm honored to meet you Fifi," he told her, adding with an almost rueful tone, "And you have at least one now. Though, thanks to all the hours I spend with my research and in the lab, I'm not sure that's much of a help... Don't have all that many myself either."

Fifi's attention was rather waning, frankly she didn't care what this cafe had to offer, she was cold and yes probably hungover and stranded. That was the worst of it. Later she would probably blame the hangover and effects of being stuck in a field of mud all night for the out of character honesty, but to be honest there was something disarming about a man who seemed so 'blind' to who she was and what she was. Fifi was used to being waited on or at least admired, to have eyes on her wherever she went both for good and ill. No doubt her keepers would already be sending their men out to find her but for the first time in a very long time Fifi was completely off the radar. As awful as this country might be there could well be something good to find in that.

Giving Marty a approving nod he didn't know how right he was to be honored by her presence. Would it have humbled him to know she'd once turned down drinks with the American Minister for Magic himself because she was too busy doing her hair? Well that and there had been the matter of three rather dashing fast rising Quiddich stars.. but that was another story for another day. Yes there was no question that Fifi 'knew' people. She would never lack for party invites nor someone to warm her bed but when it came to people she trusted her list was empty, if not for her House Elf and dog there would not be a soul that she did trust and dare considered to love. Naturally Marty happened to confuse her, it took a couple of minutes for her to realize that he'd meant that she should count him as her friend. Fifi was torn between being touched at the older mans lack of sense in wishing to be associated with one like herself and revulsion that this American who dressed in 'orrible tones of beige would dare presume that she would want to be his friend.

Maybe if she hadn't missed her daily routine of potions Fifi would have stayed with her more 'rational' thoughts that being far too old, American and unattractive she was wasting her time associating with Marty but Fifi felt vulnerable, a weakness that she aimed for the world to never see. 'Remember he could be a spy.. you don't know that you are in Australia for sure and certainly he is hiding something' Fifi reminded herself as she waited for Marty to open the door so she could climb in. "Ai can't possibly see why" Fifi muttered after Marty stated that he didn't have many friends himself. It was a verbal slip but really one glance at Marty was a full step by step checklist in how not to attract one of the opposite sex. Beige... it was enough to make her want to vomit. Throw in discussion about labs and Fifi couldn't help but wonder if the English fool had been right in fleeing while he could.

Marty was a bit surprised that Fifi had not taken the opportunity to run off like the British athlete had since he usually was not the 'life of the party'. Of course, she also seemed to be lost as to where she was and where the town was so he figured she didn't have much choice but to accompany him back. Holding the car door open for her, he waited as she settled herself, a bit embarrassed by the rare compliment, not just from her but from anyone really. Not that he went out looking for them. Make that, not that he went out much at all. Not with people. "Thanks, but.. Well, work makes going out much a bit difficult though when I get to travel, I do try to see the area." He had managed to do a bit of that the first day or two he had been in Australia, taking in the sites in Sydney where he had landed before heading to Melbourne and then on to Drouin. Marty actually hoped to see some of the outback before leaving.

He slipped behind the wheel and started the jeep, making a careful u-turn before heading back to the town and the coffee shop. What happened next, Marty wasn't even sure about why it did. He usually kept much to himself but for some reason, Fifi seemed to be one of the most trusting souls he had met in a long time. (Did we mention he did not get out much). "Actually, probably because I don't even know where to start looking for friends," he sort of mumbled, not even sure if he was actually heard or not. Nor was it in a whining tone, just very matter of fact, honest confession. Yes, Marty knew there were various social classes and standings and he was well aware that he probably would be 'nerd' level. It had been that way since school days.

Fifi slipped into the passenger seat of the car, it was very strange to her to be in anything that wasn't trimmed in black leather, had a in built minibar and disco lighting interiors. Without drinks she was forced to pay attention to Marty and the view of the highway. Fifi had time for some serious self examination which was the last thing she ever wanted, she was in a jeep with a American who seemed to think shades of mud where appropriate fashion. What had gone wrong with her life to lead her to such a point? Well that would insist that there was ever a time that she'd been on the right path. Fifi didn't know, she went where she wanted and did what she did, what was the point of thinking deeper when you never knew if some Death Eater was going to step in and torch your home in the night? No she very much needed her potions, the crystal bottles full of forget and piece of mind that her superiors always ensured where on hand.. or if not Alvin would mix one up while she tore apart her home looking for.. something.

Something that would make her a normal and whole person again maybe. Fifi didn't know nor did she always care, it was safer to think about shoes then to consider if she truly was a good or bad person. Fifi didn't comment to Marty's words for the fact that she was quite sure that she wasn't a good person, not the kind that Muggles like Marty would have thought of. He didn't know about the war, about Wizards so evil they would kill him just for being without magic. In many ways people like her where the first line of defense between order and anarchy and the rise of another dark lord. If it meant taking down a few people in the right places to ensure the Ministry would be able to protect the little people like him there was no question that she'd do it. Unable to think of something to say Fifi played with her nails, feeling slightly ill as she scraped mud from under them, a reminder of how she'd probably still be in the field had it not been for Marty's assistance.

She'd never been good at thanking others, or even considering it but Fifi glanced up to watch the trees turn into a small town in the flat style of somewhere that had been nowhere for not too many years. They had tried of course, you could tell by the garish flowers and attempt to hide the fact that this was.. a shudder.. rural. A sight at the people on the street truly drummed it in that here Fifi was in the middle of suburbia.. better known as hell. She was getting edgy from being in a town that was so.. plain. Neither had she been in a suv for so long and the height was making her feel rather ill by the time they reached The Bluebird Cafe. "Ai think it is best if Ai go, Ai have people..waiting for me" Fifi explained to Marty once she'd managed to get out of the car. Now that they where back into a place that had streets Fifi felt rather embarrassed for being seen with Marty. It was cruel but then again Fifi had never been accused of being particularly selfless. "Au Revoir Marty Harper" Fifi said glancing over her shoulder before walking away. Later she'd regret walking off on him the way she did, but if anything Fifi was always a battle of wills.. usually with herself.